Five sentence summary In most situations, I don't disclose my ADHD. I find the risk of harm to myself is greater than the potential rewards, and I can often find ways to manage without specifying that I have ADHD. Discrimination comes from all sorts of people and I've watched too many people be hurt professionally or socially when they've disclosed it's ADHD they have. On the other hand, disclosing means finding community, being a role model, and sharing your unique perspective in a world that often thinks ADHD only means hyper white boy who can't sit still in his chair. Everyone's experience is different. Everyone's level of support, position, privilege, comorbidities, and care is different and my experiences may not translate. These are simply my thoughts based on my experiences. People act completely differently when I disclose that the disability I refer to is ADHD. Sometimes they connect behaviors and issues I have, like remembering things without writing them down, to ADHD. Other times, they advise me to use a planner, make lists, or just remember to eat dinner, as if it is all that simple. There are so many misconceptions about ADHD circling, and I don't want educating the world, my colleagues, my department, my friends, etc. to be my full time job. The truth is, it would become my full time job for me personally. I would take every opportunity to do a training, speak to a class of incoming disabled students, set up a mentoring program for ADHD students, and any other opportunity that was thrown my way. There is a lot of work to be done at nearly every institution and at every level, and I would try to help every ADHD person I could. That's just the way I function. The main reason I don't disclose is because there are professional and personal consequences. I've learned this the hard way. Even if the consequences are subtle and unintentional, they set us back. People shrug off accessibility requests because "it's only ADHD." For example, prior to naming ADHD, a request to have a meeting on Zoom so I can have captioning (two modes of input=better retention) is met with, "Sure, that's easy." Afterward I disclose, it's, "Well, we'd rather meet in-person." The biases about ADHD run deep and permeate almost everyone. A recent study on higher education staff in the disability office found ADHD students were viewed as less deserving of accommodations and having lower work ethic. I will disclose to someone only if I have known them a very long time, I know they will not share my diagnosis with anyone else, and I feel the relationship is worth any work it would take to heal from misunderstandings and assumptions. I disclose less and less frequently. This doesn't mean I won't speak up when I hear incorrect information or discrimination against ADHD. I speak up against any ableist rhetoric or misinformation about ADHD without stating that I have ADHD specifically. Setting this boundary has significantly improved my friendships, my workspace, my career, and my personal health and well-being. Another reason I am disclosing less frequently is that I don't know how much ableism I'm up against; discrimination can come from the most unlikely people, and I don't have the willpower and the energy for the work. Discrimination comes in all shapes and sizes and it comes from all places. People who I thought I could trust were incredibly ableist when confronted with how my ADHD actually impacted them. Even colleagues I knew for some time, who have never said anything outwardly ableist or problematic, have disappointed me in the subtle ways they changed once I disclosed. I also find it really depresses me to disclose to someone I trust and cherish, only to have them repeat a stereotype or not take ADHD seriously. While I've certainly improved at detecting allies, ableist folks, and everyone in-between, personally, I've found I'm much happier with less disclosing. So would I advise disclosing your ADHD? This is a complicated question, but let's simplify things and assume you are one of my closest and dearest friends. I would advise not disclosing in 95% situations. I've heard too many horror stories and I've witnessed too much ableism. If we were close friends, I would say the risk of you getting hurt is higher than the potential benefits in most situations. Chances are, you can receive the accommodations you need without mentioning ADHD by name (you'll have to disclose ADHD specifically to HR, but you don't need to disclose to your boss or the folks you work with). You can say a brain-based disability or that your brain operates differently. You can simply say you're disabled and leave it at that. You can advocate for more compassion, more inclusion, and more general kindness without disclosing you have ADHD. You could even mention someone close to you is disabled in a way similar to ADHD or that they have ADHD. Remember, we're close friends and I care about you, so I would suggest trying the alternatives before disclosing that you personally have ADHD. Most people believe we're lazy and not trying hard enough. They've watched the Netflix documentary about rich kids faking ADHD diagnoses to get extended time on the SATs, or they've heard that diagnoses are 10 times what they used to be, so they question how everyone could possibly have it. Maybe they even took ADHD pills in college to cram for an exam, so they don't understand how many barriers there are to legally getting our medications. These stereotypes, that we're lazy, we've never really tried to focus, we just need to exercise more, we want someone else to do everything for us, or that we're inconsiderate and rude, these are stereotypes that they've been encultured with and, as with any bias, it takes time and effort to learn otherwise. If you are going to disclose, I wouldn't want you to do so without knowing what you're up against. The perks of disclosing Disclosing if you're in a position of power often means you're a role model to the ADHD folks who work for you. Teachers with ADHD who disclose to their students are often swarmed with requests for ADHD study tips, ADHD writing tips, and ADHD survival tips. You're proof that folks with ADHD can succeed. You're proof that folks with ADHD can thrive. Disclosing means finding other ADHD folks, finding people who will support your push for flexible deadlines, who won't judge you when you forget to respond to an email, who also need the lecture slides posted in advance, etc. You find more community when you disclose. You can have honest conversations about whether or not your department chair will mind if you're often late to faculty meetings or if that professor has a really harsh grading policy for late work. Rather than speaking generally, you're speaking with someone who knows how much that grading policy or your chair's tolerance for tardiness matters. For many of us, disclosing also means presenting more narratives about ADHD that aren't "busy white boy" and we desperately need these voices. We need to show that ADHD is diverse and heterogeneous. It is mediated by support systems and money and it is amplified by stress. We need Black ADHD voices, poor ADHD voices, Latine ADHD voices, trans ADHD voices, chronically ill ADHD voices, and every intersection. We need the folks who are going to make researchers think, "Hmm, I did not know ADHD could present this way" and "I didn't understand my typical resources might not apply to everyone." We need all of the voices. To conclude Speaking candidly about your ADHD freely and openly is certainly a valid decision. Everyone has the right to make their own choice about how vocal they'd like to be, how much they want to educate others, and how much privacy they want to have. Not disclosing my ADHD at work and not disclosing my name on the internet allows me to speak much more candidly than I would if I had my name attached. It's a complicated decision but ultimately it's your decision. There are many opinions about disclosing ADHD, activism, representation, and disclosing but you should always try to make the best choice for yourself. The person who will be most impacted by your decision to disclose is you. Key points:
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AuthorThere's a reason theADHDAcademic is an anonymous account and there's a reason why this website will remain anonymous That said, there are some basics it might be helpful to know about me: DISCLAIMER: I am not a medical professional or a lawyer of any kind. All text, graphics, and content on this website are for educational purposes only. Any and all content should not be substituted for medical or legal advice. Although I strive to provide the most accurate, current, and scientifically sound information, content should never be substituted for professional advice. Always consult a medical and/or legal professional before making any decisions. Links are provided only for reference and do not necessarily imply endorsement.
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