Five sentence (or less) summary: Don't just set out to do something; set out to do a tiny part of it and to do it badly. Identifying the absolute lowest possible bar you could set and incrementally raising it will hopefully be humorous and result in some hits of dopamine. There are no hidden expectations here. You're not giving yourself permission to do poorly ("but I really should fold ALL of the laundry"), your goal is to do poorly. We often have trouble getting started on a task, especially if it's boring, has multiple steps, and isn't going to result in an easy dopamine hit. Like most of us, I had a paper to write that I could not possibly have been less interested in. I didn't care about the consequences of not writing the paper, so anxiety as a motivator wasn't going to work. I had scheduled out my time. I knew what I had to do, and nothing. I. did. not. care. I was reading writing tips from a fiction author, and she recommended writing badly. Yep, you have this huge paper to write, you can't get started, setting a timer for ten minutes and working isn't going well, so write a horrible introduction. Write badly. Your goal is no longer to write "the introduction" or "an introduction," your goal is to literally write "a bad introduction." It's a variation of taking the pressure completely off and just write something, but your honest goal is to write poorly. Why? Takes the pressure off and honestly it is kind-of fun. ADHD folks often need that last part. I've adapted this as the years have gone on to what I'm calling the low bar reverse limbo. Steps 1. Identify: What is the absolute lowest possible bar you could set? No bar is too low! See examples below.* 2. Set it. 3. Do it. Do the limbo. 4. Evaluate (and hopefully laugh). Was that as bad as you thought? Yes? Okay, set the lowest bar possible again. No? Set another low bar but maybe inch it up a little. Just a little! 5. Repeat steps 2-4 as needed. Throw in a reward each time you complete the limbo and/or raise the bar. *The lower the bar you set, the greater chance for success. If you set too high of a bar, especially for step 1, you're setting yourself up for failure and this won't work. A huge part of the low bar reverse limbo is laughing at yourself. Your bars should be incredibly low so that rewarding yourself for moving a dirty dish from the counter to the sink is ridiculous. Inching the limbo bar up each time isn't stressful because your bar is so low to start with and you're moving it up very slowly. Big jumps are a bad idea. No one likes playing limbo with someone who suddenly moves the bar two feet lower than it was before. There's less of a chance for your own RSD to become a problem because the goals are very achievable. ExamplesExamples of lowest possible bars: Laundry: hang up one shirt. Writing a paper: write one horrific sentence. Tidying up your bedroom: pick up one item off of the floor. Math homework: do one problem incorrectly. I wasn't kidding when I said set HORRIBLE goals. We're not moving mountains here. We're moving grains of sand, and we are very open and honest with ourselves about that being the goal. You're not trying to trick yourself into doing anything here, which I think can be key. There's not some underlying motivation to write a stellar, ground-breaking paper that is 15 pages full of deep insights. The goal is to write a horrible sentence related to the topic. Then it's to write three more. Next might be making sure those four sentences sort-of relate to one another and you could show your grandmother without being embarrassed. You're not just giving yourself permission to do badly, you're explicitly making it the goal. Key points:
1 Comment
Cait
6/7/2022 05:55:30 pm
I kinda love this. Thanks 😊
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